We Meet Again (Chapter 11 (Pt. 1) out!)

[HomeStarRunnerTron]

   MWAHAHAH! I have taken ovew youw bee-loved authow's scweenname... ow... maybe.. C-loved... to tell the sequel of the compliment-winning novel, If We Met In Weal Life. The name? We Meet Again! Maniacal laughtew abounding! Still, ya know, it's a buwden to wite it, because, you know... I may lose. But I may have my wevenge still, in.. some fowm ow another! Hewe, have a... "pwo-lug-ew". Ow whatevew you call it. ... let's see.. to begin my impowtant novel...

Chaptte- Chapp... Chi-... Chiclets.. ?! ... spelling... spell check... why is thewe no spell check on this fowum?!

... oh, nevewmind... hewe, C-loved authow's scweenname! Wite youw stowy, alweady!

Thank you very much, Homestar! Here's the link to the previous novel, if you never saw it.

http://www.burninghorizon.com/hsrforum/index.php/topic,3296.0.html

We Meet Again
-- The Second Installment of The BHZ Trilogy --

Prologue- (Saving Private Benedetto): *

   The clock went off. Bubs mumbled a bit, and after a brief moment of lifting his head off the counter, he pushed his weight lazily off the comfy desk chair behind the concession stand window. He zipped past the orderly shelves on the walls filled with chips packed in conveniently tiny aluminum packs, (and his conveniently well-stocked soda dispenser), and pushed the back door out of the way, walking towards the local Free Country "jailbox".  ... This "jailbox" of sorts really... WAS a box... of sorts. Not a fancy slang term for a jailhouse that only the actual guy in prison knows it by. Like, seriously... REALLY, a box. You know, right? ... in the literal terms of... ?
   ... nevermind. It was 7 o' clock. Time to give Homestar his dinner.
   "Here ya go, Homestah!" Bubs peered through the bars. "Just like you ordered! 3 swiss cake rolls and a double stacked Bronco Trolley!"
   "Thanks, Bubsy!" Homestar said, with a content grin on his face. "Sewvice in this jail is gweat! - oh, and.. loved the hawd stuffed bwead thingies last night, Bubsy."
   "Yeah, well, anythin' fo mah best customer, even if he DID try to obliterate mah PANTS, and a couple of other people's good ol' fashion'd FREEDOM!" Bubs modestly said.
   It had been.. roughly a week since the whole "gone mad with power" incident. The incident had involved Homestar actually taking a hold of Strong Badia, then holding everyone else up as his slaves in return, and even held a prisoner captive from the real world for no apparent reason. And he can't even hold anything to begin with. It was.. some guy named Brett... Fahoog... whatever. Bubs had forgotten which name it was, or were there TWO names? Gaaah- so confusing. Two names for one... Homestar would've even succeeded in kidnapping their creators, if it weren't for their diehard fans from a.. certain online community who'd bravely (and ecstatically) ventured out in order to free THEM and.. whoever Homestar had kidnapped. Fortunately, it seemed as though Homestar had reverted quickly in his time imprisoned beyond way of escape. Homestar seemed like the ignorant powdered sugar head he'd grown accustomed to. ... Or was he still an ignorant powdered sugar head still trying hard to be.. somewhat evil?
   "- Bah, of COURSE not. Stop pondering on it, ol' Bubsy," Bubs thought to himself. "Just forget that stuff, he's fine now... well, kind of." Bubs plodded away from the stand uneasily, occasionally turning back towards his jail customer eating the complimentary catered food stuffs.
   ... and as if those thoughts were appropriately timed, a few minutes later, Homestar swerved around in his direction, a distinctly different sparkle in his eyes, realizing that all that was visible of Bubs now was the back of his concession stand. .. Slowly, a maniacal grin spread up his face. He quickly chewed down all of his moist swiss cake rolls, ("How DO they woll cake? Whenevew I twy, it just gets all cwumbly...") and took his Bronco Trolley in the other hand. He knew he was sacrificing a perfectly good piece of athletic food, but he'd have to if he ever wanted to escape before his sentence ended. ... and his sentence ended tommorow, but that was beside the point. He slipped the orange out of it, quickly gobbled up the other two sides of the cracker, and then held the orange up to the inpenetrable cardboard bars, and SQUEEZED. The citric juices (Well, it would work with ANY juices, water, or any thing of liquid sorts.. seeing as though the jailhouse was basically made of layers of pah-pers..) soaked into the bars, and after Homestar tested it with a... FINGER... he kicked straight through, and fell backward into the box.
   "GAH!" Homestar fumbled around with his flailing legs sticking skyward, grumbling angrily as he tried to regain a sense of balance. ".. stupid... owange juice... dwibbles on the box.. and... and I SLIP... when I do a cool kick and stuff.. BLECH!"
   Homestar burst out, flinging himself a good distance, as the cardboard sides broke apart from each other, leaving the jail cell nothing more than a wreck of brown squares. Suddenly, Bubs realized what had happened, and quickly leaned his head over the counter, to the back, where Homestar was standing triumphantly.
   "So long and thanks fow all the fish, suckew!" Homestar sped away in a maniacal frenzy, going all out "Olympic track-and-field" style, dipping and dodging behind trees, as Bubs attempted to fumble over the stand's front, with a flashlight in one hand.
   "- but.. 'Ey, WAIT! WAAIT! ... I'm serving MORE fish tommorow night!" Bubs waved the flashlight around frantically from his uncomfortable position. ".. man, he's at it again! ... I don't even have an ALARM this time- he WAS my built-in alarm system!"
   Meanwhile, as Bubs was trying to push himself back off the counter, and out the back door, Homestar was still dashing past, into the "creepy woods" the Free Country residents hardly ventured into, and hardly knew the history behind. The ignorant powdered sugar head ran many a block, past the creepy skull, past the Goblin's Cave... until at long long last, and long long speeding around in circles that he finally reached what he was looking for. ... The Free Country Cemetery. Homestar silently passed by the many faded, chipped tombstones he had seen many times before in the daylight. He passed by darkened headstones, countless inscribed with epitaphs, "RIP The Homestar Runner, hit on the head with a can of water soup...", "Sir Strong Bad, plummeted into the underworld in the process of a 'sportsmanlike' duel..."
   ... He wasn't looking for those, though. He hardly could even read. One by one, passing each burial, he finally stepped towards the one he'd been looking for. It was fixed loosely out of a junkyard cardboard box, and the carelessly slipshod epitaph there was written as such that you could just barely make out those haunting words, "Private Benedetto, severely wounded by Strong Badia's 1st commander. Didn't survive the attack, and didn't give the twenty bucks, neither." Homestar smiled mischeviously, with the odd glimmer still sparkling through his quotation marked vision, and slipped out a carton of "grodalated" old General Tso's Chinese food.
   He shifted the small carton to the other side, and looked at the friendly instructions inscribed on the back.

Guaranteed to bring (1) person back from the dead with one whole serving after fermentation. Pour contents into grave and chant the following words:

   Homestar tipped the carton over, and dumped all of the noodles, spices, and soup base into Benedetto's grave, took a deep breath, and started chanting the magical words...
   "Odd yakavodda yawhatzen herrak. Menjaka todda payepten larrack. Odd yakavodda yawhatzen herrak. Menjaka todda payepten larrack."
   Homestar said it over... and over... and over. His tongue began to feel twisted and dry, his R's came out worse then before, even. And that's hard to top! But he persistently kept muttering the odd chant of a non-existent dialect. Nothing seemed to happen. (GASP.) Homestar finally stopped ("STUPID CEWEAL BOX! YOU GUYS USUALLY WOWK!"), threw down the carton, infuriated, revealing one noodle strand was still in there.
   "Things be pwaised.." Homestar said faintly, picking up the carton with his nothing-hands, knocking the last noodle in, and persued to repeat the chant again,
   "Odd yakavodda yawhatzen herrak. Menjaka todda payepten larrack. Odd yakavodd-"
   The cemetery grounds started to vibrate, slowly picking speed. Then, as suddenly as it had started, it stopped. In return, however, more calamity arose. The surface immediately gave way, breaking forth a sickish-green light, as Homestar fell face forward. The headstone holding the remains of the fallen soldier trembled for a moment, then blasted into cardboard oblivion. A mysterious, small household utility pounced out of the grave, and levitated above the surface, the sick green aura compacted around itself. ... a zombified Benedetto, alive once more... was seeking some vengance against a certain.. buscuit dough-handed man.


* (revised)

[scoobysnacks]

Pretty good so far. The last one was great to. So I'm looking forward to this one.

[HomeStarRunnerTron]

Pretty good so far. The last one was great to. So I'm looking forward to this one.

Niiiice. A commentatowy alweady! This gives me the supew-sonic powew of SPEED WITING! Fowaaawd... MAWCH!

... wan out of ideas! I think I'll just... go to the... Bat Cavhsui;op=/.,gts/\]]...

Sorry, Homestar keeps on getting by my computer screen...

[yello_dello]

Oooooh!  Scary Stuff.  The ghost of Benedetto seeks revenge!  Good so far, can't wait to read more

[Darkest_Raven]

Awesome!! Homestar Runner Tron writes again!! Can't wait for the next chapter!!

[Homestar Gunner]

Awesome!! Homestar Runner Tron writes again!! Can't wait for the next chapter!!

Writes again...rides again...bronco...horsemen....what are we talking about?

Anydangway, cool start. BUT

It's just a start.

Staawt. Starrrrrrt.

I have twouble with my aws.

Good.

[neowhyachi]

Great and scary start to a new great and scary story. Wait the last one wasn't all that scary.  in fact it wasn't scary at all.  it's just great then i guess.

[stix]

Aaaah! The suspense... benedetto.. back from the dead! He'll finally be able to repay homestar

Pwo lug- 10/10

action
humor
terror... nice!

[HomeStarRunnerTron]

Man, oh man.. sorry for not updating for a while, I have writers block for this particular story. Expect a new chapter soon!
  

[HomeStarRunnerTron]

Finally! A nice, long two parter of Chapter 1!

Chapter 1- A Normal Update Morning-

   The sun rose gracefully into the sky, hitting the black border of the cartoon and bumping off, just like it did everyday. The birds were singing, the clouds gracefully moved through the sky, and the Strong Sad was gracefully flying through the air, feeling nearly weightless... in his dream. Yes, everything seemed fine, and The Cheat and Strong Mad were happily prancing through the meadows, taking advantage of this wonderful morning. Everyone in Free Country, USA seemed happy on Monday mornings, usually because they had their chance to shine, show the world what they had to say, in their comical ways of comedy.
   Today seemed just as good as them all, the duo was having so much fun hearing the petunias and tulips crunch beneath their feet, they thought of how much more fun it would be if it was Strong Sad they were stepping on, but he was dreaming, and they didn't dare wake him up, he always made a big fuss over dreams, because, they were, as he'd said himself, the only thing in his life that had been worth it. Last time they'd woken him up while he was still dreaming, Strong Sad started messing up Strong Bad's email up so badly, it didn't have time to be funny. But seeing as though not to upset the fans, they were forced to release the email. Stupid "the bird"...
   But they weren't really concentrating on their screw-ups, they were concentrating on the good times, like the time when the two of them had gone to a Halloween party as themselves, and everyone had told them how great their costumes were. They didn't really know what they had meant by that, but they didn't really care, the apple cider, root beer, and all the other great things at the party made that comment whisk away like chalk dust. Then came the dunking for apples competition. During The Cheat's turn, he'd accidentally fallen into the water, but when Strong Mad had picked up the drowning cheese anvil, there was his friend, with an apple wedged between his golden tooth.
   Then had come Strong Mad's turn, and Strong Mad couldn't seem to do it. Probably because his face has been connected to his body, The Cheat had snickered, and even Strong Mad had laughed at his odd attempt at bending over. But before they could finish thinking about the event, something happened. Not just something, since something always has to occur, or life as we know it would end. So let's just call it a "horrible event". A horrible event occured. The clouds seemed to gather, darkening and and enclosing the sky, Not even a hint of that bright blue could be seen anymore. The Cheat stopped, and gazed at the back end of the field, with his large, shining eyes.
   Strong Mad took a little longer to notice the odd change, but soon after seeing his pally no longer having fun, he quickly squashed one more marigold, and walked over to the squeaky thing's side.
   "Da cheet?" he said in a rather sloppy, but caring voice.
   "Mehna cras ro..." it said, as if in a trance, fixing his eyes unmoving at the ending of the hill, then, without further notice, screamed, "Meh na feela!!"
   A beam of popcorn balls shot directly at The Cheat. Strong Mad couldn't let his buddy get shot. He dived in-front of his friend, and blocked off the beam.
   Strong Mad was shoved back by the blast, and The Cheat landed on his stomach.
   "Cras ro! CRAS RO!" The Cheat yelled, pointing rapidly at the popcorn popper that had seemingly appeared out of a bolt of lightning.
   "Uh?" Strong Mad questioned, unknowingly.
   The Cheat rolled it's eyes and pronounced carefully, "MehnaDETTO!" That was a word Strong Mad was able to understand, and he quickly grabbed the Cheat in one hand and ran.
   Since this poor cheese anvil had just escaped buttered doom, it was wide eyed from the terror it had just experienced. (And who can blame him?)
   Right after they'd disappeared from sight (disappeared from sight in fright!), Colonel Homestar revealed himself from out of another bolt of lightning, and started laughing maniacally.
   "Whoa, Ben!" he said to his comrade, putting his arm on the zombie utility (However he did that). "You scawed the Cheat! Not last pwize-"
   "Uggh, stop the whole prize thing. This isn't a contest!" Benedetto grumbled.
   "Ohhh, it is! You just don't know it yets. Thewe awe contests hap'nin' wight befowe our vewy eyes. Wight... now!"
   Benny sighed, and started to pace (or float, if you wanted to be more exact) left and right infront of Homestar.
   "Now, what to do next in our reign of terror?" Benedetto thought out loud.
   "OH! OH! OH!" Homestar said excitedly.
   "What, Homestar?" Ben said in a dull voice.
   "Maybe we could go... get ouw galoshes and go... PLAY in the wain!"
   "WHAT?!"
   "Hey, it's the best thing to do with wains of tewwow!"
   Ben sighed, and started pacing some more.
   "How about.. hmm... how about we.. set Marzipan's patio on fire?" Benedetto suggested.
   "Oh, I dunno bout' that, I mean, she's my giwlfwiend. The only thing that I've done to hew that was the slightest bit of mean was makin' hew a maid-"
   "Fine, fine." Benny disregarded Homestar's concern of Marzipan without the least bit of concern. "How about we... set fire to Bubs's Concession Stand?"
   "What's the deaw with you and fiwe?" Homestar leaned closer to Ben.
   "Nothing, I just like setting things on fire... or better... kicking things." He said, remembering that fateful day Strong Bad has ended his popping for good, deceasing him with one fateful kick.
   Now he thought of him kicking Strong Bad to HIS doom. He snickered a little bit, then started to hear little bits of Homestar's voice coming back to his ears. (Or whatever.)

[HomeStarRunnerTron]

   "... I don't think... yeah... not vewy owiginal... what's fiwe... ways.... no.... Denny's... yeah... yeah... yeah..."
   Wait, was that just PARTS of Homestar's conversation with him, or was it just him pretending to fade in and out? He looked at Homestar. Indeed, it was just Homestar... being dumb.
   "... yeah. ... yeah? ... yeah! ... ye-"
   "Stop it!"
   "Fine, fine. But you just wuined all da fun!"
   "And what was the fun in THAT?"
   "I got to annoy you!"
   "... haha... very funny. You think you're all that, don't you."
   "Do I think I'm all that donchoo? ... why did you sneeze?"
   "I didn't! I said don't you!"
   "No, you said donchooOOOO!!" Homestar insisted, blowing Benedetto away with his voice.
   "Stop getting me off subject!" Benedetto screamed.
   "What, how am I doing THAT? Am I... pushing you off subject? Cuz I can't weally get you off it any othew way-"
   "Oy vey, neverMIND!" Benedetto screeched. "How about we kick the Cheat?"
   "No, highly unowiginal. We need something new... but... sinistew!" Homestar advised.
   "Hey, thanks, Homestar! You finally said something intelligent!"
   "Oh, youw welcome! ... But... standing on one foot is funnew. You should try it!"


   Senor Cardgage was walking around in his office, waiting for some awexome dude to pick up the phone, and ask for some mortgage... or... whatever that was. Senor Cardgage had been asked to read that by a director, but his small noggin hadn't been able to comprehend what the word, "mortage" meant. He'd spent these last 48 hours pondering it... but nothing seemed to come.
  Homestar suddenly snuck into the office, and went behind Senor Cardgage, disguised as a potted plant, which looked more like Homestar with a green mustache, and an umbrella stuck to his propeller cap. But the odd man couldn't seem to tell the difference, and turned to it, saying, "Why, what a lovely petunia to pass my time of sorrows!", and started to pluck the umbrella off Homestar's cap.
   Homestar quickly stood up, shaking off his lovely plant get-up and yelled, "Alwight, fatty cool guy! I need an answer to my quest on! ... ow question. Not suwe which. But I need it fast!" Suddenly, he lowered his voice to a whisper. "I can't figuwe out how to play Pheasant's Nest."
   "You take a left on the turnstyle, then take a right through ma corner stone." "Oh, thanks! Here's a gift of my gwatih-twi-tuctuwe!"
   "Beg pardon, missy, but I think you've messed with the wrong Reginald-" But Homestar ignored the combover man, and brought Benedetto from behind his back.
   "GO, BENNY!" Homestar shouted. Benedetto shot a beam of butter right on Senor Cardgage, and he started to melt, oddly enough. "Give me a call on my ceeeeelllyyyyyyyy!" was all he was able to say right before he melted in it's silent entirety. All that was left of the odd man were his specticals, and what looked like a beaten, used cellphone.

[Faded]

Woah! This story is really spooky..........and good!

[HomeStarRunnerTron]

Woah! This story is really spooky..........and good!

Man, don't know why people think it's spooky, it's more... funny-spooky. H*R style spooky. Which isn't really spooky. At all. But in a H*R aspect, it's VERY spooky.

[scoobysnacks]

This story is really good. Im looking forward to the next chapter.

[Darkest_Raven]

I'll agree with that! Great story so far!